It sounds to me like you did. [clarke doesn't even question it with how much she believes in him. she remembers he'd told her in the same conversation that he's got her for that but she's glad that he took her advice to heart. though there is a part of her that feels like he doesn't really need her anymore which may be attributed to how much time has passed for him in comparison but she tries not to dwell too much on that either or what her feeling about that even mean.
hearing bellamy tell her he knows she doesn't blame him is one thing but she knows it's still something he feels guilty about despite his words] I probably must have told you that before too, huh? [it was a guess but she knows that it's something she would have talked with him about even if she doesn't remember it] I think it's still worth repeating though even if to lessen the guilt you feel. [she doesn't want that for him and if she could somehow alleviate that for him she would absolutely do it.
in between all the information that they unloaded on her when she arrived, she does remember that raven had briefly mentioned something about murphy being six years into their future so the moment bellamy brings up the time they will actually be apart back home, it only makes her dread going back even more. whether it was a few days, a couple months or as much as six years, she had always missed bellamy when they were apart so the thought that it would be that long makes her chest tighten. it was overwhelming and unbearable to think about all at the same time and she hated it] Six years? Considering I felt like I wouldn't survive past another month, that's kind of hard to imagine right now.
[it was a miracle she even survived two months on her own given how praimfaya destroyed pretty much everything in its path. it would have been so much easier if she had known for certain her friends were still alive but the truth of the matter was that each day was a struggle for her and six years was a longer than the time they had estimated too. it isn't until bellamy jokes that their time apart was longer than they've been together that she can't help but laugh slightly and as usual it's enough to make her easily smile towards him] You're right though, I don't like the sound of it being that long before we see each other again.
[it was kind of sad if you think about it but with how serious the conversation had been, she knows that he was trying to ease the tension they both felt. hearing this admission that follows with how much he missed her on the ring and even the time she was gone here was something that similarly surprised her in a way because they have never really expressed it in words before to each other and unknown to him it was something she could have said almost word for word herself too if she allowed herself to be more honest. it would have been something she'd have said to him earlier among the many thing she wanted to talk with him about but she refrained mostly out of worry that he'd feel even more guilty for leaving her behind. she doesn't want him knowing because of that but ironically she finds herself resolve breaking on that and his admission just moments ago gives her the courage to admit something of her own but before that she tries to reassure him that she isn't going anywhere] You don't have to miss me anymore since I'm right here.
It was the same for me though— you know, sometimes I'd probably just spend hours just looking up at the sky wondering how you were doing up there. Not that I knew for sure you made it but I kept holding onto hope that I'd see you again. [she huffs a laugh because what she is about to say next probably makes her sound crazy] It's part of the reason that I tried to call you over the radio every single day as crazy as that probably sounds given the stupid thing didn't even work.
no subject
hearing bellamy tell her he knows she doesn't blame him is one thing but she knows it's still something he feels guilty about despite his words] I probably must have told you that before too, huh? [it was a guess but she knows that it's something she would have talked with him about even if she doesn't remember it] I think it's still worth repeating though even if to lessen the guilt you feel. [she doesn't want that for him and if she could somehow alleviate that for him she would absolutely do it.
in between all the information that they unloaded on her when she arrived, she does remember that raven had briefly mentioned something about murphy being six years into their future so the moment bellamy brings up the time they will actually be apart back home, it only makes her dread going back even more. whether it was a few days, a couple months or as much as six years, she had always missed bellamy when they were apart so the thought that it would be that long makes her chest tighten. it was overwhelming and unbearable to think about all at the same time and she hated it] Six years? Considering I felt like I wouldn't survive past another month, that's kind of hard to imagine right now.
[it was a miracle she even survived two months on her own given how praimfaya destroyed pretty much everything in its path. it would have been so much easier if she had known for certain her friends were still alive but the truth of the matter was that each day was a struggle for her and six years was a longer than the time they had estimated too. it isn't until bellamy jokes that their time apart was longer than they've been together that she can't help but laugh slightly and as usual it's enough to make her easily smile towards him] You're right though, I don't like the sound of it being that long before we see each other again.
[it was kind of sad if you think about it but with how serious the conversation had been, she knows that he was trying to ease the tension they both felt. hearing this admission that follows with how much he missed her on the ring and even the time she was gone here was something that similarly surprised her in a way because they have never really expressed it in words before to each other and unknown to him it was something she could have said almost word for word herself too if she allowed herself to be more honest. it would have been something she'd have said to him earlier among the many thing she wanted to talk with him about but she refrained mostly out of worry that he'd feel even more guilty for leaving her behind. she doesn't want him knowing because of that but ironically she finds herself resolve breaking on that and his admission just moments ago gives her the courage to admit something of her own but before that she tries to reassure him that she isn't going anywhere] You don't have to miss me anymore since I'm right here.
It was the same for me though— you know, sometimes I'd probably just spend hours just looking up at the sky wondering how you were doing up there. Not that I knew for sure you made it but I kept holding onto hope that I'd see you again. [she huffs a laugh because what she is about to say next probably makes her sound crazy] It's part of the reason that I tried to call you over the radio every single day as crazy as that probably sounds given the stupid thing didn't even work.